Jumia

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

ENEMY WITHIN!


can't say I love him,
won't deny it,
He means more to me,
More than life,
I can’t tell him,
I choose not to let him know.

Why? You ask,
Why? I ask,
Good question,
Why can't I let him know?

Letting him know means letting go,
Declaring my love to him makes me his slave,
Professing my love for him makes me weak,
In that weakness,
I begin to resent him,
In resenting him,
I resent me.

I begin to hate what I am,
What I saw in him and most of all what I love about him.
I start to push him away,
I keep to myself,
Keep away from him and later avoid him.

I will cry for him,
Yearn got him,
Crave for him,
Hate myself for letting him walk,
All of this I do in secret.

My soul is cold,
Mt heart is stone,
It’s funny,
What I long for is what I loathe most.

I am my own enemy.

© thelma migue, 2014.


A cizoepoetry collection